Written by Rebecca Raynham.
It's been a little while since I last did a blog post, due to our baby being born a few months back. If you follow me on Instagram, then you know already that Freya was born safely on the 16th November.
We are all so in love and Alfred is head over heels, after a few initial ups and downs.
I will write our birth story soon, as it was such a good experience, but for now I thought I would update you all on how we have been getting on since the birth.
For the first two weeks after got home from the hospital, I was high on love and euphoria. I didn't even get the baby blues after the birth. I fell in love immediately this time around and I credit Alfred on showing me what it means to love a child. I know what this love will become, thanks to him. I know that as the months and years go by, the bond will get stronger and the love will grow deeper. I think this knowledge is what made me instantly feel true love, as soon as I laid eyes on Freya.
I would love to know if anyone else experienced this with their second children?
A couple of weeks in, the tiredness hit... I think everything suddenly hit me and the exhaustion took over. I was still really happy though.
The main thing that made me emotional was Alfred. I felt bad that he wasn't getting 100% of our attention all of the time. I could see that it was a huge adjustment for him and it killed me a little bit. I still get pangs of guilt now, but everything feels so much more settled and "normal" now and I know that Alfred's memory of being the only child is quickly fading.
He really does love Freya and nothing made that more apparent than a few weeks after she was born...
In December, we all got really ill.
Alfred had been ill with various things for months, due to starting preschool in September. In the weeks leading up to Christmas, Alfred was not himself, it was just a cold, but a bad one. It gave him a cough that wouldn't go away. Then Dan got it and it went to his chest. Then I got it. It was seriously the most ill that I have been for years. I woke up shaking with a fever and couldn't speak. For two weeks I felt weak and could barely walk across the living room. I could easily have been mistaken that it was the flu... but it was a terrible cold, the RSV strain, that went to my chest. Then unfortunately, Freya caught it off me. Over a few days, she gradually declined before we rushed her to A&E with breathing problems and dehydration.
She was diagnosed with bronchiolitis and kept in HDU for almost a week and it was one of the most draining weeks of my life. I struggled with her being so poorly of course, but I also struggled with leaving Alfred at home. A week is a long time to not see your two year old, especially when you are all in the throes of bonding with a new baby.
Once she was finally home, Alfred was sooo excited! He was overjoyed that she was home and it made me realise how much he had accepted her into his life. My heart could have burst with pride and relief.
Happily, she is now completely recovered and we are now back to bonding as a family of four. It is an experience that we won't forget in a hurry though!
Over the past couple of weeks, I have started to feel like myself again. I have slowly started getting back into my fitness and work. Which brings me to my next topic that I want to talk about;
You may have noticed the blog name change! I decided that this little space of mine has moved in a different direction to what it was when I first started blogging. I feel like using my name gives it more flexibility, to encompass all of the new and exciting things I will be working on this year!
I am working on a few new interiors posts and will be starting a new style series, where I will be sharing a different outfit edit each month. I will be talking more about the ups and downs of motherhood and hope to also start including more travel and beauty content.
I am excited to get stuck in and share it with you all!
For now, happy 2018 everyone, may be it be filled with good health and happy times!
(PS I have put a little film at the bottom of this post, of Freya's first two months in our lives - it is mainly filmed on our phones, so not the best quality, but it's filled with happy memories and I wanted to include it).